THIS CHAPTER WAS SO FUNNY. Epic lolz.
It was the first one written from a different perspective since Chapter 1 and for the most part I found it really funny. In the previous Chapter, Blunt and Mrs Jones were deciding what to do about Harry Bulman, and I was pleasantly surprised by how quickly we found out.
We followed Bulman and got to know more about him, and I can safely say - as I'm sure anyone else who's read this too can - that he was a genuinely nasty piece of work. He's arrogant, selfish, greedy (he was thinking about not giving Alex any of the money from the potential booksales) and lazy. The opening paragraph is him dreaming about winning 'Journalist of the Year'. Don't get me wrong, I've fantasized about winning various books awards, only I never plan to blackmail and exploit children.
Anyhoooo, he gets up and goes out to buy breakfast, and he passes a Newstand with a headline 'Journalist Killed'. He doesn't register it but I TOTES GOT WHAT WAS GOING DOWN and immediately wondered what MI6 were up to: were they planning to kill him later and just use this toalert him to the fact? All would soon become clear.
Things got MUCH weirder VERY quickly. He tried to get on the bus with his Oyster Card (that's a sort of Travel card that you can top up with money so you don't have to buy tickets all the time, if you didn't know) but even though he'd just topped it up it said he had no credit on it. He tried to get money out but the cashpoint rejected his card and swallowed it. He treid another and the same thing happened. All this time I was sure it was MI6, but I've no idea how they did it. He got more and more wound up which was very amusing: he certainly deserved it!
He headed to where his car was parked because he knew he still had money in there, but the car was gone. He treid to phone 999 to report a theft but his phone had no signal. Using a phone box, he contacted the police, gave his registration number, only to be told that the number was registered to a different car and owner.
Seriously p'd off by now he stormed into a bank to complain about the cards. I felt sorry for the man at the desk: I worked part-time at a library, and when you got impossible customers like that you started to hate humanity... well maybe not quite that much but you get my point. The man tells Bulman that the account was closed a year ago and there's no money in it. He storms out and someone (MI6?) just happens to drop a newspaper open on the page about the dead journalist. It's him. Ok now he starts to panic. He runs home to find the locks have been changed and he can't get in. Oops.
A policeman walks past and tries to help, but when Bulman says his name they recognise it as the 'dead journalist' and get suspicious, ask to see ID - he has none - then ask to see in his briefcase only to find a knife covered in blood. LOLZ. He's arrested and they later tell him he's escaped from a mental hospital, his real name is Jeremy Harwood and not to worry, he'll soon be back and can't hurt anyone. Remind you of Shutter Island? Here I did get a bit worried, because even though I don't like him I didn't want that to happen to him - it was a bit excessive. Anyway, MI6 agent Crawley comes in and tells him that they orchestrated it all and won't be so lenient if he goes anywhere near Alex or tries to publish the article. Ouch. So he's crying and not happy but has no other option, so that's the end of him.
I hope.
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